Family Violence

Health Promotion Disease Prevention

Instructor: Gregory M. Chase, MS Emergency Medicine, MSHED, PA-C, RN

Helping A Family Member to Escape Abuse

Community Health Introductory Program: Principles of Instructional Design

Author: Gregory M. Chase, MS, MSHED, PA-C, RN.
Dr. David Sellen, PhD precepting

 

Introduction Learning Series Stop Family Violence-Our Mission Statement Introduction Prevent Family violence Am I Abusive? self assessment checklist Find help in your area What's Family Violence Personal Safety Planning Teens and Dating Violence, Date Rape How can I help my familly or friend What is Domestic Violence Deaf & Blind, if you can see read, if you can hear, listen Immigrants and Domestic Violence helpline Child/Teen Cyber Safety Guide CPS phone numbers in your area Abuse & Neglect how are they defined   Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is abused by an intimate partner- spouse, boyfriend, friend. On the average, more than five women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends every day. For support and more information please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or at TTY 1-800-787-3224.   Abuse in America In the year 2001, more than half a million American women (588,490 women) were victims of nonfatal violence committed by an intimate partner. Deaf, Deaf-Blind and Hard of Hearing Outreach. National Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) Statistics In 2005, there was IPV in about 1 in every 320 U.S. households.3 For 2008, the U.S. Bureau of Justice Statistics estimates that: IPV constituted 5% of all violence against males and 22% of all violence against females in the U.S.4 The rate of IPV for females age 12 or older was 4.3 per 1,000, a 53% decrease since 1993. Against males, the rate was 0.8 victimizations per 1,000, a 54% decrease since 1993.5 72% of IPV against males and 49% of IPV against females was reported to police. About 99% of IPV against females was committed by male offenders, and about 83% of IPV against males was committed by female offenders.  References 1 Compiled December, 2011. 2 http://www.opdv.ny.gov/statistics/reports/index.html#1_2 3 Klaus, P. (2007). Crime and the Nation’s Households, 2005. Bureau of Justice Statistics, NCJ 217198, http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/index.cfm?ty=pbdetail&iid=752. 4 Truman, J.L. (2011). Criminal Victimization, 2010. (National Crime Victimization Survey). BJS. http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/pub/pdf/cv10.pdf. 5 Catalano, S., Rand, M., Smith, E., & Snyder, H. (2009). Female Victims of Violence. BJS. http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/index.cfm?ty=pbdetail&iid=2020. 6 Ibid.

How can I help a friend or family member who is being abused?

Don’t be afraid to let him or her know that you are concerned for their safety. Help your friend or family member recognize the abuse. Tell him or her you see what is going on and that you want to help. Help them recognize that what is happening is not “normal” and that they deserve a healthy, non-violent relationship.

Acknowledge that he or she is in a very difficult and scary situation. Let your friend or family member know that the abuse is not their fault. Reassure him or her that they are not alone and that there is help and support out there.

Be supportive. Listen to your friend or family member. Remember that it may be difficult for him or her to talk about the abuse. Let him or her know that you are available to help whenever they may need it. What they need most is someone who will believe and listen to them.

Be non-judgmental. Respect your friend or family member’s decisions. There are many reasons why victims stay in abusive relationships. He or she may leave and return to the relationship many times. Do not criticize his or her decisions or try to guilt them. He or she will need your support even more during those times.

Encourage him or her to participate in activities outside of the relationship with friends and family.

If he or she ends the relationship, continue to be supportive of them. Even though the relationship was abusive, your friend or family member may still feel sad and lonely once it is over. He or she will need time to mourn the loss of the relationship and will especially need your support at that time.

Help him or her to develop a safety plan.

Encourage him or her to talk to people who can provide help and guidance. Find a local domestic violence agency that provides counseling or support groups. Offer to go with him or her to talk to family and friends. If he or she has to go to the police, court or a lawyer, offer to go along for moral support.

Remember that you cannot “rescue” him or her. Although it is difficult to see someone you care about get hurt, ultimately the person getting hurt has to be the one to decide that they want to do something about it. It’s important for you to support him or her and help them find a way to safety and peace.

If you think your friend or family member may be abusive, click here to find out more.

Please call the 24-hour National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224 to discuss your concerns and questions.